Dang Curious George and his homemade instruments. We had quite the "off" day yesterday, and I'm blaming the monkey.
I was barely awake, knocking around the kitchen, and the next thing you know, Drew is pilfering the recycling bin. He was dragging out milk cartons and paper towel tubes and JUNK. I was frustrated already, and so I said, "Why? WHY are you dragging all of that stuff out?" I was trying to clean up the kitchen and kick start myself into summer school mode.
"I need to make some instruments mom." I agreed that it sounded like fun, but suggested that RIGHT NOW was perhaps not the best time. Cue early morning meltdown. "Mom. I.JUST.WANT.TO.MAKE.MUSIC!!!" For the love.
It was pretty much this same idea over and over and over all day long. The grand finale was a huge fit that resulted in a major consequence. Don't we all hate a consequence...
After summer school, and after dinner, I attempted to regroup. "Let's play outside", I said. I was hoping to clean out the wreck-mobile while the kids had fun frolicking outside. There was no frolicking. Drew had a massive "motorcycle" wreck, which resulted in bleeding and mass hysteria. This prompted a big drama fest from Emily, just because she does not like to be outdone.
Thank goodness I ended the day at book club. You know, with grown-ups? Turns out a crazy day was going around. It's always reassuring to hear that your child's behavior is "normal" and they are not on the fast track to juvy. And there were cookies. Dipped in chocolate. Which always sets all things right in my world.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Hungry Hippos
Don't you hate it when you wake up with the same headache you went to sleep with? Me too. I went to bed obscenely early on Thursday night because I had a massive splitter. Splitter is my word for a horrible headache. One of those when you take more than the recommended dose of pain reliever and it doesn't matter one bit. You might as well have taken sugar pills. I thought for sure if I just went to sleep it would be gone. Nope. Oh the insult to still have it in the a.m. I was not sure whether it was allergy related or caffeine related. I failed to take my allergy medicine and had no caffeine on Thursday. I have no idea why I skipped caffeine. I have dubbed 2011 as the year of caffeine. Yes, I'm addicted. No, I don't care one bit. So, first thing Friday morning I took an allergy pill and drank a large glass of tea. My headache was gone in approximately 30 minutes.
We had a great day at summer school. I feel so blessed that God is allowing me to be home with my kiddos and still make some extra money. Every day I thank Him for providing for me in such profound ways. I think the kids are having a good time and I think all the mamas are happy. It's early days, so I'm hoping I don't run out of fun ideas. Our afternoon outside time is not popular because of...you guessed it...THE HEAT! I'm thinking I'm going to have to institute daily water play. I hope I don't use up all my hard earned cash-ola on my water bill!!
In the meantime, my children are eating me out of house and home. I'm going to have to increase my grocery budget by approximately a kabillion dollars. Drew has entered the land of eating like a growing boy. This is my first experience with this phenomenon. He has started asking for seconds at dinner (which, before I had to beg him to finish his plate) and will eat an entire lunch of sandwich, veggies and fruit and want a whole other lunch. And will eat it all. He says to me about 76 times a day, "I'm so hungry!" And he definitely requires a bedtime snack. No idea where he gets that from... And I know he's really hungry because he's just as willing to eat healthy stuff as he is junk food. It's astounding really, and does not bode well for the teenage years. I might need to buy a deep freeze and start stocking it now.
Last but not least, the goggles were a success! He did not obsess and swam like a fish during our pool session. And, put back in its proper place of late afternoon, our day was much better. We are, as they say, creatures of habit.
I hope you don't mind my mundane ramblings-you know where I can write 100 words just about my headache. Turns out when I'm not around grown-ups for days at a time, the words get all built up! AND, biggest shout out to my soul sister Jen, her husband Greg and their BRAND NEW BABY, Jack!!! I'm sad I haven't had my hands on him yet. He is a picture of God's extravagance, that's for sure!! Love you Jen and Greg!!!
We had a great day at summer school. I feel so blessed that God is allowing me to be home with my kiddos and still make some extra money. Every day I thank Him for providing for me in such profound ways. I think the kids are having a good time and I think all the mamas are happy. It's early days, so I'm hoping I don't run out of fun ideas. Our afternoon outside time is not popular because of...you guessed it...THE HEAT! I'm thinking I'm going to have to institute daily water play. I hope I don't use up all my hard earned cash-ola on my water bill!!
In the meantime, my children are eating me out of house and home. I'm going to have to increase my grocery budget by approximately a kabillion dollars. Drew has entered the land of eating like a growing boy. This is my first experience with this phenomenon. He has started asking for seconds at dinner (which, before I had to beg him to finish his plate) and will eat an entire lunch of sandwich, veggies and fruit and want a whole other lunch. And will eat it all. He says to me about 76 times a day, "I'm so hungry!" And he definitely requires a bedtime snack. No idea where he gets that from... And I know he's really hungry because he's just as willing to eat healthy stuff as he is junk food. It's astounding really, and does not bode well for the teenage years. I might need to buy a deep freeze and start stocking it now.
Last but not least, the goggles were a success! He did not obsess and swam like a fish during our pool session. And, put back in its proper place of late afternoon, our day was much better. We are, as they say, creatures of habit.
I hope you don't mind my mundane ramblings-you know where I can write 100 words just about my headache. Turns out when I'm not around grown-ups for days at a time, the words get all built up! AND, biggest shout out to my soul sister Jen, her husband Greg and their BRAND NEW BABY, Jack!!! I'm sad I haven't had my hands on him yet. He is a picture of God's extravagance, that's for sure!! Love you Jen and Greg!!!
Friday, June 10, 2011
I'm Meelllllttttinnnnggg...
Let's just get this out of the way: THE HEAT. Are you kidding me? It's barely double digits in JUNE and it's already pushing 100 everyday. There's been all sorts of talk about record breaking and the like. I've done really well with my attitude about this. Until yesterday. Yesterday I hit some sort of wall. I think it was a combo of crabby kids, a massive headache, and have I mentioned, THE HEAT???
We've had a great week. We had the day off on Wednesday and met our good friends at the now famous Dragon Park. It was a great time and I'm learning some new tricks to keep Drew cool, which in turn makes everyone's life easier. The kid loves to play, and play hard. There came a definite time of "We'd better go right now" and I'm learning more and more about taking that cue right away. I'm sometimes tempted to push it, especially when I'm having fun with my friend! And of course, we did more swimming that afternoon.
Yesterday we switched things up a little bit. Tuesday, when we were at the library, they announced "Wildlife on Wheels" was coming to the library on Thursday. Well, Drew tuned in and definitely wanted to do it. It's a little program the zoo does-bringing around some animals for the kids to check out. I just could not bring myself to go. When we were there for story time it was complete pandemonium. And I teach preschool, so I have quite the threshold for tiny people going bananas. So, I bribed Drew and told him we would go swimming two times yesterday. It worked. Yes, I'm shameless.
We were almost the only ones at the pool yesterday and Drew swam his little heart out. He's having a blast. I love it. However, he started opening his eyes under the water, and as you know, this can lead to some PAIN. So, instead of heading back to the pool yesterday afternoon, we went to Target to get some Spiderman goggles. I'm concerned about the goggles, I'll be honest. He could easily get completely obsessed with how they feel and it could all go down in flames. I'll keep you posted.
Meanwhile, I think it is our afternoon trip to the pool that makes the late afternoon heat bearable. Our house gets really warm by about 4:00. We had it checked out last summer and our units are just fine. I'm pretty sure it's something like "You need to replace every window in your home" kind of a thing, and frankly, well, it ain't happening. So. We sweat. I was a little delirious last night, so we ended up in my bedroom with me getting a check-up from the kids and the Elmo doctor kit. The good news is I only weigh 25 minutes. The bad news is, I have a bad ear and my heart is now located in my lower abdomen.
We've had a great week. We had the day off on Wednesday and met our good friends at the now famous Dragon Park. It was a great time and I'm learning some new tricks to keep Drew cool, which in turn makes everyone's life easier. The kid loves to play, and play hard. There came a definite time of "We'd better go right now" and I'm learning more and more about taking that cue right away. I'm sometimes tempted to push it, especially when I'm having fun with my friend! And of course, we did more swimming that afternoon.
Yesterday we switched things up a little bit. Tuesday, when we were at the library, they announced "Wildlife on Wheels" was coming to the library on Thursday. Well, Drew tuned in and definitely wanted to do it. It's a little program the zoo does-bringing around some animals for the kids to check out. I just could not bring myself to go. When we were there for story time it was complete pandemonium. And I teach preschool, so I have quite the threshold for tiny people going bananas. So, I bribed Drew and told him we would go swimming two times yesterday. It worked. Yes, I'm shameless.
We were almost the only ones at the pool yesterday and Drew swam his little heart out. He's having a blast. I love it. However, he started opening his eyes under the water, and as you know, this can lead to some PAIN. So, instead of heading back to the pool yesterday afternoon, we went to Target to get some Spiderman goggles. I'm concerned about the goggles, I'll be honest. He could easily get completely obsessed with how they feel and it could all go down in flames. I'll keep you posted.
Meanwhile, I think it is our afternoon trip to the pool that makes the late afternoon heat bearable. Our house gets really warm by about 4:00. We had it checked out last summer and our units are just fine. I'm pretty sure it's something like "You need to replace every window in your home" kind of a thing, and frankly, well, it ain't happening. So. We sweat. I was a little delirious last night, so we ended up in my bedroom with me getting a check-up from the kids and the Elmo doctor kit. The good news is I only weigh 25 minutes. The bad news is, I have a bad ear and my heart is now located in my lower abdomen.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Um...What??
Ya'll. I'm having the best summer ever. I hesitate to put that out there. I'm sure I'm inviting some sort of wrong something to happen, but I just needed to say it. Because, really, it's come as quite a surprise. There are a myriad of reasons I was not looking forward to this summer, but it has surpassed expectations and we are two weeks in.
We started summer school two weeks ago. As the time drew closer, I was getting more and more anxious. I was a nervous wreck about Moms checking out my house-scrutinizing, if you will-because their kids would be spending the day here. I've covered my complete lack of housekeeping skills. There might have been some panicked cleaning going on. Maybe. It is also nerve wracking to have little people as your "clients". And by little people, I mean kids, not those of short stature. Just thought I would clear that up. Kids are fickle and they are picky and if they don't have fun they might not come back. And that means mama don't get paid. But, the kids who have come through here have been great. We have had a blast. The best news is MY kids have been awesome. Emily totally believes she is four, and troops right along with everyone. Her favorite subject is art. And usually her canvas is her arms. And Drew. That guy, he has been amazing. He has been kind, he shares toys, he takes care of Emily. He has been so go with the flow (which if you know him you know this must be the result of divine inspiration...) and it has been fun to watch. It is pretty amazing that I get paid to be with my own children and watch them play. I am not missing the God in this. It is a HUGE answer to many of my prayers. And fun to boot.
Don't get worried, either, because we are still able to make it to the pool everyday. I have to say I'm rather proud of myself for taking my chickies down there EVERYDAY. We've got our prep down to a science so it doesn't take four hours to get ready anymore. And, TODAY-magic. Drew has been getting more and more brave playing in the water without his floaty on. And, when he has his floaty on, he started wanting me to throw him-which meant he was going under. Yesterday he was holding his head under the water and I was so proud. He was rather proud himself. I was gearing up to try some more swim lessons. Which, is a little feeble considering I don't know much about teaching a kid to swim. Turns out, I don't have to. Drew totally taught himself to swim today. I'm not kidding. He went from hanging on the side of the pool afraid to stretch his legs all the way out four days ago to swimming almost the entire width of the pool. SWIMMING, I SAY. I'm not going to lie. I was obnoxious. I was completely flipping out. He.just.started.swimming.
Honestly, I don't know why I'm surprised. This is Drew's way. And it has been his whole life. It is no mistake that Drew is my child. He is one big, fat life lesson all wrapped up in one little package. Every milestone he has approached, I have been anxious about his being behind. And, for crying out loud, I'm a teacher. It's who I am. So, I try to teach and coach. And then I secretly obsess. But, always, once I back off, it's only a matter of time before he figures it out all on his own. Listen, I'm slow to learn in so many areas. I'm trying on this one. I've done much better lately, and even when the cute mom in the two-piece at the pool said, "Yeah, we just threw our kids in there and made them go at it," I only felt defensive for a few minutes. After all, she was in a two-piece. I kind of wanted to mention that had I ever, at any point, just thrown Drew in the water, he might, just might, have had a seizure. I digress.
All this to say, MY BOY SWIMS! And as a mom there is nothing better than watching your child feel proud of themselves.
We started summer school two weeks ago. As the time drew closer, I was getting more and more anxious. I was a nervous wreck about Moms checking out my house-scrutinizing, if you will-because their kids would be spending the day here. I've covered my complete lack of housekeeping skills. There might have been some panicked cleaning going on. Maybe. It is also nerve wracking to have little people as your "clients". And by little people, I mean kids, not those of short stature. Just thought I would clear that up. Kids are fickle and they are picky and if they don't have fun they might not come back. And that means mama don't get paid. But, the kids who have come through here have been great. We have had a blast. The best news is MY kids have been awesome. Emily totally believes she is four, and troops right along with everyone. Her favorite subject is art. And usually her canvas is her arms. And Drew. That guy, he has been amazing. He has been kind, he shares toys, he takes care of Emily. He has been so go with the flow (which if you know him you know this must be the result of divine inspiration...) and it has been fun to watch. It is pretty amazing that I get paid to be with my own children and watch them play. I am not missing the God in this. It is a HUGE answer to many of my prayers. And fun to boot.
Don't get worried, either, because we are still able to make it to the pool everyday. I have to say I'm rather proud of myself for taking my chickies down there EVERYDAY. We've got our prep down to a science so it doesn't take four hours to get ready anymore. And, TODAY-magic. Drew has been getting more and more brave playing in the water without his floaty on. And, when he has his floaty on, he started wanting me to throw him-which meant he was going under. Yesterday he was holding his head under the water and I was so proud. He was rather proud himself. I was gearing up to try some more swim lessons. Which, is a little feeble considering I don't know much about teaching a kid to swim. Turns out, I don't have to. Drew totally taught himself to swim today. I'm not kidding. He went from hanging on the side of the pool afraid to stretch his legs all the way out four days ago to swimming almost the entire width of the pool. SWIMMING, I SAY. I'm not going to lie. I was obnoxious. I was completely flipping out. He.just.started.swimming.
Honestly, I don't know why I'm surprised. This is Drew's way. And it has been his whole life. It is no mistake that Drew is my child. He is one big, fat life lesson all wrapped up in one little package. Every milestone he has approached, I have been anxious about his being behind. And, for crying out loud, I'm a teacher. It's who I am. So, I try to teach and coach. And then I secretly obsess. But, always, once I back off, it's only a matter of time before he figures it out all on his own. Listen, I'm slow to learn in so many areas. I'm trying on this one. I've done much better lately, and even when the cute mom in the two-piece at the pool said, "Yeah, we just threw our kids in there and made them go at it," I only felt defensive for a few minutes. After all, she was in a two-piece. I kind of wanted to mention that had I ever, at any point, just thrown Drew in the water, he might, just might, have had a seizure. I digress.
All this to say, MY BOY SWIMS! And as a mom there is nothing better than watching your child feel proud of themselves.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Summah Time
You know what trips me up on the blog? The dang pictures! Anytime I have a post that includes pictures it takes me forever to get it up. So, today I just decided to put a photo-less post up and I'll get to all my pictures later. I realize it's not rocket science to upload pictures and put them on here, but I'm lazy and it's a tiny bit of work.
I've been on a little mini vacation. I mean, I didn't go anywhere or anything, but it's been exactly one week since I wrapped things up at school. Last Wednesday was our end of the year school picnic (and you'll be happy to know we did not have to cancel on account of the cicadas...) and we went out to celebrate (pics to come...someday...). Since then we've been having some lazy days with a few fun events thrown in there. (Again, pics...well...you know...)
Today we went back to the pool and let me just say, progress was made. And, I have a feeling you are going to be given a blow-by-blow of our afternoons at the pool. I know you are beside yourselves with excitement. Anyway, today as Emily and I were sitting on the side of the pool splashing our feet and Drew was paddling around with his floaty on, I thought to myself, "You know, I'm kind of glad he wears that floaty, because I don't have to watch him so closely. It could be hard to watch both kids so closely." I'll have you know it was not five minutes later he saunters over and says, "I want to take my floaty off." Really?
So, the duck was shed and I helped him understand he could really touch in the 3 ft. end of the pool. I wish every one of you could have seen the look on his face. He.was.ecstatic. He was super proud of himself and even made up a song called "Don't freak out in the pool." I'm not kidding even a little. About this time, Emily decided she might want in the pool, too. She sat on the top step, actually in the water. I was a touch panicky trying to keep my eyes on everyone. Drew kept wanting me to do "swimming lessons" with him, but refused to do anything I suggested. Not much "lessoning" went on. Although, he did doggy paddle to me a little bit. I'm not gonna lie. I was proud.
Emily, mean time, made friends with another lady at the pool and proceeded to talk her head off. Which consists of saying the same phrase over and over, louder and louder until you understand and repeat it back to her. I can't tell you how much fun it is to do that all day. The lady at the pool was very patient. And then when Emily started doing tricks-"blowing bubbles" which was actually licking the water-she would look up to make sure her new friend was watching. She's a socialite, what can I say?
Tomorrow we start "summer school". I'm a) excited, b) nervous, and c) REALLY concerned about the behavior of my own children. It's going to be interesting. To say the least.
I've been on a little mini vacation. I mean, I didn't go anywhere or anything, but it's been exactly one week since I wrapped things up at school. Last Wednesday was our end of the year school picnic (and you'll be happy to know we did not have to cancel on account of the cicadas...) and we went out to celebrate (pics to come...someday...). Since then we've been having some lazy days with a few fun events thrown in there. (Again, pics...well...you know...)
Today we went back to the pool and let me just say, progress was made. And, I have a feeling you are going to be given a blow-by-blow of our afternoons at the pool. I know you are beside yourselves with excitement. Anyway, today as Emily and I were sitting on the side of the pool splashing our feet and Drew was paddling around with his floaty on, I thought to myself, "You know, I'm kind of glad he wears that floaty, because I don't have to watch him so closely. It could be hard to watch both kids so closely." I'll have you know it was not five minutes later he saunters over and says, "I want to take my floaty off." Really?
So, the duck was shed and I helped him understand he could really touch in the 3 ft. end of the pool. I wish every one of you could have seen the look on his face. He.was.ecstatic. He was super proud of himself and even made up a song called "Don't freak out in the pool." I'm not kidding even a little. About this time, Emily decided she might want in the pool, too. She sat on the top step, actually in the water. I was a touch panicky trying to keep my eyes on everyone. Drew kept wanting me to do "swimming lessons" with him, but refused to do anything I suggested. Not much "lessoning" went on. Although, he did doggy paddle to me a little bit. I'm not gonna lie. I was proud.
Emily, mean time, made friends with another lady at the pool and proceeded to talk her head off. Which consists of saying the same phrase over and over, louder and louder until you understand and repeat it back to her. I can't tell you how much fun it is to do that all day. The lady at the pool was very patient. And then when Emily started doing tricks-"blowing bubbles" which was actually licking the water-she would look up to make sure her new friend was watching. She's a socialite, what can I say?
Tomorrow we start "summer school". I'm a) excited, b) nervous, and c) REALLY concerned about the behavior of my own children. It's going to be interesting. To say the least.
Monday, May 23, 2011
Last Day of School
I'm in shock.
Yesterday I wrapped up my first year as a preschool teacher. I seriously cannot believe the year is over. Add to that the fact that I honestly thought we had a whole extra week, and I'm flat perplexed. I don't think any period of time in my life has ever gone by so fast.
I have to say, that while taking a break from the rat race for a bit will be nice, I'm sure going to miss my little class. They have grown and changed and matured so much over the past year. The last few weeks have been so sweet. I've begged them to just stay in the three year old class forever, but since most of them are already four, they're having none of it. They are ready to move on. Most said they will at least wave at me in the hallway, a few said no! Ha! I'm also terribly sad about losing the moms in my class. They are THE BEST. I have had so much fun getting to know them. It has been great being in the same season of life. While I can't offer any sage advice, I can definitely relate on every level. They have been loving and supportive and fun. GREAT way to start, that's for sure.
I will also miss having so much bonus time with Drew at school. His class has been right across the hall and his teacher is a good friend. We've had lunch together bunches of times, go to Spanish and Creative Movement together, and play on the playground together. Next year he'll be all the way down the hall in the oldest classroom. Sniff. I'm so thankful to have had a window into his school life. So special.
We have a work day tomorrow, then a school-wide picnic on Wednesday, and after that there will be no more things I haven't done yet!! HOORAY! I've spent a lot of my time this year pretending like I knew what the heck was going on, when really I had no clue. I will be so happy to at least have some understanding of the way things go.
Our summer is starting to take shape. I will be hosting a little day camp here three days a week for a few kids and I'm really excited about it. I know it will be work, but I will get to be with Drew and Emily and DO WHATEVER I WANT. No government regs to comply with!! Ha! I have lots of fun ideas swirling around in my head. The best part is, most of the kids coming are families from school, so they are sweet and wonderful. I'm sure there will be many anecdotes forth coming about this little adventure.
Otherwise, I plan on making lots of memories and soaking up as much of my kiddos as I can before the school bell rings next fall.
Yesterday I wrapped up my first year as a preschool teacher. I seriously cannot believe the year is over. Add to that the fact that I honestly thought we had a whole extra week, and I'm flat perplexed. I don't think any period of time in my life has ever gone by so fast.
I have to say, that while taking a break from the rat race for a bit will be nice, I'm sure going to miss my little class. They have grown and changed and matured so much over the past year. The last few weeks have been so sweet. I've begged them to just stay in the three year old class forever, but since most of them are already four, they're having none of it. They are ready to move on. Most said they will at least wave at me in the hallway, a few said no! Ha! I'm also terribly sad about losing the moms in my class. They are THE BEST. I have had so much fun getting to know them. It has been great being in the same season of life. While I can't offer any sage advice, I can definitely relate on every level. They have been loving and supportive and fun. GREAT way to start, that's for sure.
I will also miss having so much bonus time with Drew at school. His class has been right across the hall and his teacher is a good friend. We've had lunch together bunches of times, go to Spanish and Creative Movement together, and play on the playground together. Next year he'll be all the way down the hall in the oldest classroom. Sniff. I'm so thankful to have had a window into his school life. So special.
We have a work day tomorrow, then a school-wide picnic on Wednesday, and after that there will be no more things I haven't done yet!! HOORAY! I've spent a lot of my time this year pretending like I knew what the heck was going on, when really I had no clue. I will be so happy to at least have some understanding of the way things go.
Our summer is starting to take shape. I will be hosting a little day camp here three days a week for a few kids and I'm really excited about it. I know it will be work, but I will get to be with Drew and Emily and DO WHATEVER I WANT. No government regs to comply with!! Ha! I have lots of fun ideas swirling around in my head. The best part is, most of the kids coming are families from school, so they are sweet and wonderful. I'm sure there will be many anecdotes forth coming about this little adventure.
Otherwise, I plan on making lots of memories and soaking up as much of my kiddos as I can before the school bell rings next fall.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Blooms of Extravagance
As I was driving down highway 100 today, I noticed a tree I hadn't noticed before. It's weird that I've missed it. It sits on a little farmstead that I always wonder about as I drive by. It's a tall tree, taller than the barn, taller than the house, standing alone in its place. And, it's covered with blossoms. I did not want to stop looking at it. Something about that tree caught my heart.
I finally realized it is quite unusual to see a tree that tall blossoming as this one is. Perhaps the tall trees have their own splendor just by the sheer fact of their size. Perhaps God reserves the blooms for the smaller trees-giving them a splendor of their own.
This tree stirred something deep within me. For me, this tree symbolized God's extravagance. A tree already magnificent because of it's size and shape is now beyond a masterpiece because of its flowers. A place where God has poured forth beauty and grace-a little less restrained-all in one place.
Why does extravagance leak out in some places and not others? Mystery.
Larry Crabb says this, "...it's more difficult for Christ to restrain Himself from making all our dreams come true than for us to watch them shatter...He is right now holding Himself back from showering us with every conceivable blessing."
Holding Himself back. It seems He wants every tall, majestic tree to shine beautiful with blossoms. But for reasons unknown to us, He holds back. He.holds.back. The man who walked here. The man who deeply understands the frustrations of flesh in the way of experiencing all of who He is.
And so, I have to choose to believe. I have to choose to believe that His holding back is just as loving as His pouring forth.
I finally realized it is quite unusual to see a tree that tall blossoming as this one is. Perhaps the tall trees have their own splendor just by the sheer fact of their size. Perhaps God reserves the blooms for the smaller trees-giving them a splendor of their own.
This tree stirred something deep within me. For me, this tree symbolized God's extravagance. A tree already magnificent because of it's size and shape is now beyond a masterpiece because of its flowers. A place where God has poured forth beauty and grace-a little less restrained-all in one place.
Why does extravagance leak out in some places and not others? Mystery.
Larry Crabb says this, "...it's more difficult for Christ to restrain Himself from making all our dreams come true than for us to watch them shatter...He is right now holding Himself back from showering us with every conceivable blessing."
Holding Himself back. It seems He wants every tall, majestic tree to shine beautiful with blossoms. But for reasons unknown to us, He holds back. He.holds.back. The man who walked here. The man who deeply understands the frustrations of flesh in the way of experiencing all of who He is.
And so, I have to choose to believe. I have to choose to believe that His holding back is just as loving as His pouring forth.
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