Thursday, July 7, 2011

The Joke's on Me

First, did I actually refer to my "favorite" character in FNL by the wrong name??? Yes ma'am, I sure did. Guh. There is just no way to avoid looking like a schmuck in this scenario. LANDRY. His name is Landry. And I totally know that. It might have been funny if I'd called him Lance like Coach always did. But I didn't. I gave him a completely new name and referred to him as my favorite.

Would it help to say that I had been studying the math portion of my Praxis book? Did you know that math makes my brains turn to mush? Yes, even elementary math.


In other news about the joke being on me, my daughter, the 21 month old, has already developed definite opinions about her clothes. Gooood times. She is super into layering. As in, she screamed bloody murder at me when I questioned her choice to wear two pairs of shorts. At the same time. Topless. We are the very definition of class around here. She changes her shoes around 7 times an hour, and unloads her drawers two or three times a day. And strips. This is all a brand new ballgame for me. I can pretty much still throw any old shirt and shorts at Drew and he'll barely turn away from cartoons and put them on. But, heaven forbid I change diaper brands for her highness. No more Elmo on the diapers? She was not pleased. I have friends with teenage daughters. I'm booking time in their calendar 9 or 10 years from now already. Because, clearly, I'm the meanest mom ever since I won't let Emily wear two onesies to bed. How dare I?

Meanwhile, in the land of Drew, truth has become a slippery attribute. He's trying out different versions of stories fairly regularly, which is a nice way of saying he's lying. A lot. I've been assured it's a normal phase for his age, but it really doesn't help that pit in the stomach of a mom when they think their kid might end up in juvy. The funniest part is that kids are HORRIBLE liars. And they think they are really good at it. He's astonished when I don't actually believe him. Good. Let's just keep him thinking I have amazing mom superpowers. It'll prepare him for when I track him using his cell phone.

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