Thursday, January 23, 2014

#DayThree

Yesterday I mentioned that when I was busy staging Elf shenanigans I did not always work "as unto the Lord." Which, obviously was just to make a point because even I have a hard time seeing how Elf shenanigans could bring glory to God.

But working "as unto the Lord" is a real thing. Like, from the Bible and everything.

I'm in what you might call an "awkward phase" when it comes to work. You might remember that I left my job at the preschool to go on staff at the church we attend. Things started to get really weird around October (which for the record is when our whole life got really weird/hard for a few months. I'm convinced it's because we decided to go to the DR). Anyway, as you know I leave out all gory details in this particular space. I think I will just say that it was kind of an experiment to hire me in the position and it turns out they probably don't need a whole person in the job. Which, is too bad since I need a whole job! My hours have been drastically reduced. This has been hard financially, obviously, but I have also been really sad about the whole thing.

You might know that my first "career" was working in a church as a Children's Minister. It was really hard a lot of the time, but it was a job where I really got to use all of my gifts. I definitely needed a break when we moved away from Knoxville, but when this opportunity came along I thought this might be God leading me back into church work. I can't really explain what happened and that's the honest truth. So. Anyway. After quite a while of licking my wounds, I dived into sorting out what direction I might go in next.

Which finds me where I am today. In a state I would describe as "underemployed".  I languished around in this situation for a long time. The timing was, of course, super unfortunate since it coincided with the holiday/grief/seasonal affective disorder of it all. Last week I was with a trusted friend and we were hashing out life, as we like to do, and she gave me the gentle nudge I needed to stop it already.

I've spent a lot of my languishing time really thinking about what I want to spend my life doing. And then I read an amazing article about how God's calling on my life is not about me. It's about what I can do for others. As dumb as it sounds, I think I've been looking at it wrong my whole life. Which, you know, is always a delightful conclusion to come to.

The first clue came when I was subbing during December. I realized (again) how much I love being a teacher. The second clue came when reading a different article about "calling". The article said one clue to your calling is that people ask you to do this thing. It's reinforced from those around you that you are really good at this thing. Sometimes you may not even realize it's a "thing" because it comes so naturally to you. I've been trying to think about the things  a) I am passionate about and b) have served others before.

I will let you know working through these things has not produced a magical, perfect job. It is surprising, isn't it? But, it has given me some good direction.

So, back to working "as unto the Lord". I have realized in the time I am not working for cash money, I should be using the time to serve my "neighbor" with the gifts God has given me. This is not looking like anything drastic at all. It is basically just trying to be intentional with my time-either working towards the next step, or working in my "calling". It's an interesting place to be. And, it requires some {UN}afraid-ness, because at this particular juncture, leisure time does not pay very well.

I know you are on the edge of your seat. I can't wait to tell you all about my next step. You know, whenever I figure out what it is! #mystery

Can't stop. Won't stop.

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