Hi! Ya'll, I'm tired! But wait, you say! It's summer! Time for leisure and fun.
Thing is, it's not exactly panning out to be that way! I know you're shocked that my life is not filled with leisure and fun. This little post is just some random tidbits about life currently. I keep hoping I'll find the time to post more regularly. I'm telling you, grad school just sucks the ever lovin' creativity right out of you.
First, I wrapped up the year at preschool, and while I was glad to close a "drawer", I was pretty sad. This little class of eight magical kids was so special. I have no doubt God hand-picked these kids (and their parents) because he knew exactly what kind of year I would have. I have known a lot of kids in my life, and more often than not I think the naughty ones are mostly funny. So, just know, when I say I never had to get on to the this group of kids, I mean NEVER. They were just all good, kind, funny, smart kids. I'm going to super miss them. They made me feel like a great teacher. I have a feeling I might have a "humbling" year coming down the pike!
Second, I'm back in school. I don't know if I ever mentioned the insanity that ensues in this program in the summer. My first course (yes, it's already over. Scary, huh?) happened in May before preschool finished. I had the privilege of attending class Thursday night, Friday night and all day Saturday. I know. Try not to be jealous. I will say, when I started this course, I was giving serious thought to taking some time off from school. I had been praying about it for some time. A soul friend had mentioned it might be a good idea. I thought maybe God was moving me that way. THEN. I went to that first class, and the professor spoke right down into my heart. It was JUST the confirmation I needed that I was indeed in the right place at the right time. Sometime I'll share that story. I'll warn you first. You'll need tissues. So, now I'm on the greased slide of summer grad school, trying to hang on for dear life and get those As! I don't usually talk about my grades, but I'm pretty proud of the A I got in my spring class since I had a few life crises happening at the time. Once I get the summer over with, I'll only have two more courses to go!
Third, Ms. Kelly's summer play days are in full swing! Thursday I had 9 kids here in addition to my own two. It was a crazy good time. I feel blessed that I am able to be home and still make some cash. I always wanted to have a camp of my own. While this wasn't exactly what I meant, I 'll take it. Turns out I quite enjoy being my own boss. (For some of you this comes as little surprise!)
Fourth, Drew is taking karate! I finally cashed in my lame mom card and got the boy registered for kindergarten (don't even get me started...) and signed up for an activity. The whole family went on Wednesday night to watch. It was one of those complete surreal "I'm a for real mom" moments. I'm excited for him-I think this will be a good confidence builder before he goes to school. Poor kid had to be coaxed to holler when he kicked! It'll do him so good to let out some of the emotion!
Last, I'm still walking the mourner's path, trying to be intentional about my inner life. That sentence. It's pretty churchy, huh? Not like old days churchy, but these days churchy. Words like "intentional" and "inner life". Ha! I'm such a jargon lady. The week between preschool and summer camp, my siblings and I started the task of cleaning out mom's condo. It was every bit as hard and sucky as I had imagined it would be. It basically came down to putting on my business lady face and getting it done. There were moments of cracking up and breaking down, which is basically how it's always been in my family. Like walking in a mine field, you never knew which random item was going to bring you to your knees. My hardest moment came when we were going through mom's DVDs and my brother asked me if I wanted "Mama Mia". My mom loved this movie, and one of the last times I stayed with her before hospice, we watched it together. I'm so glad we did. But, it will probably be a while before I can watch it again. A friend of mine asked me if I was "camping out" with my grief or on the path. Such a great way to describe it. I told her I felt like my grief had become portable. It is still with me every minute, but the fog is starting to lift and I'm starting to be able to get some things done.
I'm thankful for these days and who they are shaping me to be.