Thursday, June 12, 2008

Let's All "Go Toddler"

Great news for all of you out there with "eco-angst"! I have solved the nation's energy crisis! (Who says the mom of a toddler can't get anything done??)

Here's the plan. As soon as we can figure out a way to painlessly extract energy from toddlers, we will no longer be dependent on oil-foreign or otherwise. We need to set up a little energy extraction station. It can be like the beloved MARTA stations here in Nashville. A mom drives up and deposits her toddler in the extraction room. This room is FULL of stuff that toddlers should not be touching or playing with. You hook them up to some kind of energy machine and turn them loose. This place should be run by grandparents who think that toddler mischief is HILARIOUS. They would not be stressed by all the running around, and probably would encourage it! While the energy from mom's toddler is being pumped into her car, Mom gets to sit in a sound proof room in a massaging chair.

This is a great plan, no? All those who have raised toddlers already can get a discount on toddler energy. Consider it "time served". Those who have not yet had the pleasure of daily life with a toddler would have to pay a higher price-just helping them think twice before bringing another one of these crazy things into the world!!!

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